Anger
'Management' techniques
from outside the box

Anger is the result of a core belief in limitation. Like all emotions it is the smoke from the fire of definition and it doesn't just fly out of nowhere even if it seems that way. Something is going on inside you (subconsciously) to drive the anger. The biggest problem when searching for a solution is that we don’t recognize this as consciously obvious and this puts us a number of steps away from our power to change it.

For example, when we get angry, it’s usually from some cause, either outside or within us, over which we think we have no control. For most of us anger arises as a response to external triggers. Another person, a situation or event and we think the solution lies in changing the external cause.

Now, if your angry about some business system, work production or machine for example which dveloped a fault, changing the external cause can work to get a suitable result sure. Yet how is it that another person can respond to similar situations and remain calm.

We can't ensure our life’s happiness by always controlling the environment around us. It's futile to say the least, regardless of whether the emotion is anger, sadness, fear, guilt, hurt or resentment. Approaching personal change from this angle (which is what we’ve been taught to do) is an illusion. It puts us as far as we can be from our true power to influence the feelings which are coming up. Put yourself in an environment you love sure, and realize that wherever you go, you’ll take yourself with you!

When other people trigger our anger, they are actually offering us a gift. To make them (or anyone else) change is a lost cause for us cause because that means we have put our power in them ie. they 'make us' angry, as if we're powerless. But that's the gift. Don't get caught up in the illusion of power, but learn to use the power of the illusion. The awareness that we have passed our power to them unconsciously, and that's one of the reasons why we get angry (if your the kind who likes reasons).

The solution to any emotion lies in the consciousness of the body feeling it. Making this shift in perspective is essential. It’s the equivalent of ‘getting past the hump’. From here on in it’s more of a downhill run. The going becomes fundamentally easier especially if you become even more curious about yourself (since the solution isn’t outside you).

This takes us a step closer to our true power because we begin to look at our behaviors and actions. At least we own them now, so we can influence them. Almost immediately we then query our capability to be thinking in an 'angry' way. “What must I be thinking to get me angry and cause me to enact this behavior?”

This is another even more empowering step closer to the cause of our anger. This is about as far as most of us get without some kind of coaching or assistance. [We can’t expect to progress without education and this is what coaching or counselling is all about; learning about you.] As soon as we begin to realize that we are placing expectations on others, (which when not fulfilled results in our anger), then we feel we are capable to influence a change by changing our thinking process. However we may still feel somewhat powerless even with this recognition and if that’s the case then we need to look at our beliefs.

At the beliefs level we ask a question to take us even further down the rabbit hole. “What must I believe in order to feel a need to place this expectation upon others?” One thing that comes out of all this is the realization that you dohave both more choices available, and the ability to make lasting changes once you transform the core beliefs. Of course somewhere along this line of thinking, the question arises, “So how do I change my beliefs?”

One very important facet we too often leave out of this equation can be revealed by asking yet another question: “Who has been managing your beliefs all your life?”. There’s more to you than just your conscious mind so being open to improving your relationship with your unconscious mind will be yet another step toward your true power. What I'm getting at here is that you can't do it by will power! Fighting your unconscious mind is what causes problems, it doesn't improve them. Change isn't something that's forced. It must be 'let' to occur.

Having access to the tools which effectively change core beliefs will ensure you’re up with the best technology to achieve your results in an Holistic and empowering way. I believe that NLP & Time Line therapy™ provide exceptional anger management techniques in skilled and qualified hands. In fact they are so effective, it's more like a solution rather than a coping or managing tool because the emotions are so radically transformed. Clients just can't find those old feelings!.

A Personal breakthrough process is designed to transform your experience from limitation to empowerment quickly and easily.

So you can see that an event on the outside that seems to be the sole cause can lead us to discover even more about ourselves by asking quality questions which can only be answered by you. Hopefully you will have already become more curious about yourself in the process. You are always evolving. There will always be changes to make, but life can be a much more pleasant adventure as you do so with more and more self awareness.